“To have and to hold, for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health, till death do us part…” these words put a smile on my face every-time I remember them, however, on the flip side, there are no good sounding vows of pregnancy, childbirth or motherhood. Over time, centuries and generations, mothers have been bringing forth children; which explains why you and me are here. Could this be why we call mums ‘super heroes’?… because they automatically find a way to carry, birth and care for this little human without any good sounding vows to remind them of the journey they have embarked on? Let’s find out….
On the 24th of September 2018, I said ‘I do’ to the love of my life, my tall, dark and handsome man, the epitome of Christ’s love and soon to be father to our bundle of joy. As the journey of marriage ensued, we were faced with a decision of when to start a family which would become a life changing decision. Just like a jigsaw puzzle, the pieces were all over so we couldn’t see what the picture looks like, until we took the first step…prayer. I’m a firm believer in prayer and seeking out the guidance of God in everything I do, and I mean everything…(even in the kitchen I ask God to help me come up with a meal when my creativity has hit a dead end, which it does a lot!). In Malachi 2:15 the Bible tells us that God seeks Godly offspring therefore it would only make sense to reach out to Him and find out how to do so. Some of the verses that give direction along this journey include the following, but not limited to;
In psalm 127:3 it says, “Children are a heritage from the Lord, offspring a reward from Him”.
In Exodus 1:19 it says, “Hebrew women are vigorous and give birth before the midwives arrive” this speaks of the promise of easy and fast labor.
Isaiah 66:7 “before she goes into labor, she gives birth, before the labor pains come upon her, she delivers a son. Who has ever heard of such things, who has ever seen things like this?” Another promise of easy and fast labor.
Isaiah 66: 11 “for you will nurse and be satisfied at her comforting breasts, you will drink deeply and delight in her overflowing abundance” the promise of continuous supply of healthy breast milk.
I was baffled at the amount of information there was about pregnancy, childbirth and motherhood in the Bible; then in one of my many ‘eureka’ moments, I realized the vows of motherhood are safely tucked in the word of God. Who would have thought? But only if we believed without a shadow of doubt because God’s word needs to partner with our faith in order to be effected. Being a first time mom, I breathed a sigh of relief knowing that I have a place to start from that would ground me, otherwise, I would be carried away by all sorts of information out there on how best to be a mum which can make your head spin in confusion and anxiety. Don’t get me wrong, Information is good. However if it’s not guided, it may overwhelm you and set you off on a course of fear and anxiety.
Our brains are very powerful organs which when fed with the right information, the end results are brilliant. Before getting pregnant, I started recounting words like ‘I will not have any complications in my pregnancy, I will not have an ectopic pregnancy, I will carry the baby to full term, I will not develop oedema or gain unnecessary weight, I will still rock my ragged jeans and leather jacket because mummy has to look good, I will have a safe natural delivery etc…the list is endless but that will do for now. I knew that the more I heard these words the more they would sound like the norm and therefore if I heard anything other than this, my brain wouldn’t register them and therefore get rid of anything that doesn’t match up with them.
Romans 12:2 says “Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what Gods will is-His good, pleasing and perfect will”.
I refused to conform to the patterns of this world when I heard of all those scary pregnancy stories and myths and I chose to renew my mind as to what God would want me to experience, which is everything good, pleasing and perfect in this journey and eventually when I hold my bundle of Joy in my hand.
On the flip side, there are times when I’ve been faced with worries which would steal my joy, but these moments went on to build my faith in trusting God and by reciting uplifting verses like this one in the book of Philippians 4:8 which says “whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable-if anything is praise worthy-think about such things”. I would literally have to steer my brain into thinking of good things, and if that still poses a challenge, I would go through the baby clothes and have a look at them imagining that very soon, there will be a little human dressed in these adorable outfits. This would automatically move my mind from a place of fear to a place of immense love and joy. Call it mommy retail therapy, but I assure you it works to get you out of the gutters of fear.
Our first trimester went by so fast and it was time to spill the beans to friends and family. My husband and I decided to keep it a secret for the first 3 months. However I remember this day when I insisted on taking a baby bump picture despite my belly not showing. I pleaded with my husband who all along was wondering what exactly he was capturing because even through the phone camera, my belly was as flat as an iron board. But boy was I determined to start capturing every second of this journey. Well, fast forward to the 3rd trimester, my belly now announces my presence in the room even before my face is sighted.
The transition and transformation I have gone through in pregnancy has brought great understanding to the verse in Philippians 4:13 that says “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me” and so to all the 1st time moms, rest assured that Christ has equipped you and strengthened you in all manner of ways to bring forth your bundle of joy, His Godly offspring. When the odds seem to be against you, He has it all covered. When the mummy worries check in, remember to overcome them through the power of God’s words. I decided to make a list of verses that I keep reciting almost daily, some of them I have listed them here. They have helped me deal with any doubt that threatens to rise or any negative words said to me in line of my pregnancy. I realized that if I didn’t do this, then what armor would I have to protect myself and the baby with? For as long as I allowed the negativity a chance to roam in my thoughts, then I put myself and the baby in danger which is not good. So, reading or reciting the word of God has all the power to erase the lies that come with the negative thoughts while replacing them with the truth of Christ Jesus. Let God’s word be your mummy vows.
As I wait in anticipation for my EDD (expected date of delivery) the reality of becoming a mum settles in my mind and heart, however the realization of how much God is anticipating this birth is equally important. He longs to have yet another Godly offspring whom he has destined for greatness far much more than what my husband and I can offer our bundle of joy.
“To have the privilege to partner with God in his marvelous creation, to have an opportunity to be a vessel of God as He adds to His creation, to have a chance to see God continue to expand creation through me, to have Godly offspring that glorify our Lord Jesus Christ….” Let these be your mummy vows.
About the author:
Mona Mwesigwa is a woman after God’s heart, an amazing wife, a soon to be excellent mother, a nutritionist from the University of Nairobi and passionate about food security systems in underprivileged communities. Her dream to change the world through food security is under incubation and the world will live to experience it in due time. Her impact on multiple lives has always been in simple ways like this (blog) yet has reached thousands with a greater force.